Employees who lack confidence can be hard to coach, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. Helping a talented employee shed his insecurities sets him up to achieve what he’s capable of. But it won’t help to call out his low self-esteem or to simply pay him compliments. Instead, you have to help him own a compliment. Instead of giving broad praise like, “You’re really good at your job,” focus on something specific he has done well. Then help him to see his strengths. Ask: “What does that compliment mean to you? Why do you think I'm choosing to give it to you?” You can also help someone own a compliment given by someone else. For example, you might say, “I heard John tell you that you did a good job with the quarterly report. Why do you think he said that? What do you think he was particularly impressed with?”
Adapted from
“Overcoming the Toughest Common Coaching Challenges,” by Amy Gallo
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