We waste too much time and emotion during negotiations. We argue about items that don't really matter and let our feelings override our logic. If you want to move a negotiation forward and advance to where you want to be:
- Understand the common goal. You both should articulate your goals and interests in writing and share them to ensure clarity and alignment.
- Be transparent and explain the why of your points. It's surprising how seldom people explain why they're fighting for something. The other side likely doesn't know why you're asking for a term or condition. If something is going to impact you personally, think about disclosing it – the other party may understand.
- Calculate what's actually important. Figure out how material each point is. Then determine what's really worth fighting for in the bigger picture – and what you might be able to use as leverage.
Adapted from "
Keep Time and Emotion from Killing a Negotiation" by Anthony K. Tjan.
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